Had my first scan! 27.06.2016

Today I had my first scan! My approximation on how far along I am was indeed correct πŸ™‚ I am currently 14 weeks pregnant to the day (28.06.2016) and its also my birthdaaaaay πŸ™‚ The lady who did my scan was lovely! I couldn’t have asked for a better Sonographer.

So I wasn’t feeling nervous but by the time we arrived at the waiting room for my appointment and bought the tokens so I could get some scan photos I was feeling so nervous. Not really sure why! So she called my name and we went into the room, and she put the gel on my stomach (which isn’t actually as cold as some people make out!)

After moving the thing around and seeing my baby on the screen – it was so weird! I could see it moving inside of me but I couldn’t feel it! she wasn’t happy with the quality of the images so she sent me away for half an hour and then told me to go back! (dragged not going back to work out a bit;)) Had a lovely costa and back in we went – the images were much better! It didn’t look like my baby was chopped in half this time – haha!

Its so surreal seeing the little head and nose, the hands moving up to the side of the head and seeing the little feet! I can’t wait until my next scan in August πŸ™‚ They did the screening for down syndrome, the way Β they do it on the scanning screen just measuring the fluid at the back of the baby’s neck combined with my age and the size of the baby and that gives a percentage of the risk of Downs. As I’m only 21 and in good health the risk is super low πŸ™‚

The baby is 15.5cm long! Im not sure if this is bigger than a baby should be at 14 weeks? Showing everyone the scan photos at work they said the baby looked big! Unless the image was just zoomed in πŸ™‚ According to my standard pregnancy app it says the baby at 14 weeks is the size of a peach and 8cm??! that cannot be right surely.. unless I’m reading the scan photograph wrong. It says at the very top 15.5cm. Unsure if thats the length of the baby now.. Can anyone with some experience of scan photographs enlighten me please?! haha

But yep thats pretty much an overview of what happened, I had a blood test and then I was off πŸ™‚ Its so strange now, I know how the baby is laid. When my stomach is a little higher at one end I can just about feel the head! πŸ™‚

My first scan photo: (13 weeks 6 days)

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Kirsty x

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13 Weeks Pregnant (I believe!)

After Monday I’ll be able to stop putting (I believe!) at the end of my weekly updates because I would have had my proper dating scan πŸ˜‰

So I am now in my 2nd trimester! I think I’m 13 weeks pregnant today and I’m beginning to show! Β This week again, not much has changed. I have been getting a few pains but this is probably where my uterus is getting bigger! – Β Such a scary thought! I can not imagine my body becoming so big as I’ve always been so small. I definitely can’t imagine giving birth to a baby!

According to my pregnancy+ app, my baby is now the size of a kiwi! It can open and close the fists and will soon be sucking the thumb! Pretty much all of the organs are in place – its going so so fast for me! It seems like only a few days ago I was 7 weeks pregnant, let alone 6 weeks ago!

I am going to start looking at some stretch mark creams, I haven’t got any as of yet, but I am trying to avoid stretch marks as much as I possibly can! I was pretty proud of my body before I got pregnant and I am hoping (hoping being the operative word) that I am able to get it back after the baby is born πŸ™‚ If anyone can suggest a brand/store that is sold in the UK and is pretty good for stretch marks, please let me know πŸ™‚

I am currently babysitting whilst writing this so I didn’t really have a good place to put the laptop to take a photo so I won’t include on this week!

I haven’t had to wear maternity clothing yet, I am pretty worried for when nothing starts to fit me, I’m fussy with my clothes and I am only 5 foot tall. I am usually a size 6 in clothing and I think that when nothing starts to fit me in the waist or bust I’m going to have to start either getting a bigger size and they’re probably not going to fit in me in the length because I’m so small! This is going to either sound stupid or ironic, but do they sell like petite maternity clothing for smaller ladies??

Kirsty x

Studying whilst on maternity leave and with a new baby?!

Just casually sitting on my bedroom floor whilst writing this blog post. Just felt like I needed a bit of time on my own. I never know why I sometimes feel that way because I love the company of others! But I suppose every human needs it once in a while πŸ™‚

I went to my old college today to sign up for a brand new course that they’re doing this year, I am already level 3 qualified in childcare and early years education. But after graduating that about 2 years ago now I have decided that I want to progress my qualification. Before I ended up back down south I took the Foundation Degree in Childhood Studies seriously and was going to apply to the university. But for some reason there was something stopping me, maybe it was fete.

But anyway, me and my friend from work went to apply for the new level 4 course which is basically an introduction to the Foundation Degree which would be level 5 and 6. Now people have probably got this far and now thinking, how are you going to manage a course and a newborn baby? I know its manageable and I know people do it. But this course is only 3 hours a week in the actual university building so it won’t take up much of my time.

Once I become committed to something I stick by it and that is what I fully intend to do with this. It starts in September and my baby is due around December time so I may miss a few lectures but I will be able to catch up on that. I am also aware of the coursework requirements that come alongside it. The level 3 course was very very coursework heavy and I found it pretty hard work to keep on top of it all but I did it and I came out with an A grade.

With this ill be on maternity leave for most of, if not all of it so ill have some spare time when the baby is asleep or spending a bit of time with my family to catch up on some. Everyone needs a break sometimes right? – my coursework will probably be my break (haha) I spoke to my manager and I love my workplace because they have always been supportive in everything that I do. I will be able to go into my setting whilst on maternity to carry out things that need to be done for my course. Such as my child observations etc.

Im not really sure why I made a blog post about this but I think it will be nice to look back on at some point and compare my life then to how it is now. I want to be a good role model for my baby and thats what I fully intend to do. Whether his or her father is involved or not. I also feel that doing this course is another part of my pregnancy journey, its another challenge I’m going to face and I know I’m going to make myself and my child proud.

Kirsty x

Another appointment and 12 weeks pregnant today (I believe!)

I can honestly say that I have never gotten appointments with the NHS so fast in all of my life πŸ˜‰ Although this appointment they’ve now made for me I don’t think all pregnant women have to attend? My friend was pregnant and didn’t have to attend one of these..

I work in childcare and have done basic background studies on pregnancy and things that happen during, although the majority of my course focussed on the child itself rather than the pre-natal things. I have never heard of an ‘obstetrics outpatients appointment’ like I said my friend fell pregnant around 2 years ago and she didn’t have to go to one of these.

I probably did the worst thing ever and briefly googled it and it said something about the midwife only puts you forward for these appointments if there may be some issues / worries during pregnancy.

I am aware that everyone within the NHS swear by peoples’ BMI. I hate BMI. According to my BMI I am underweight, so this is probably why I have to attend one of these appointments. I am not underweight. I am a petite 5 foot tall and usually around 6 stone 1. (obviously not at the moment! I’m actually around 6 stone 7 and I’ve never been this heavy! Β – thanks baby ;)) My mum is only about 4 foot 8 and thats why I’m not concerned about myself being slim and petite.

People keep saying that because I’m small I’m going to have a small baby, not sure how true their theory is πŸ˜‰ hopefully he or she won’t be a 9 pounder haha! I also need to attend a diabetes screening appointment at some point.. My dad has diabetes so I have him to thank for that πŸ˜‰ I just can’t believe how many appointments I have to attend! Although it gets me a few hours/half a day off work πŸ˜‰ as much as I do hate hospitals!

If anyone reading this has been to an obstetrics appointment please can you enlighten me to what it involves πŸ˜‰ I love how the NHS just presumes everyone is fully aware about the whole process!

Also; I am 12 weeks pregnant today (I believe) until I have my dating scan I can only go by the date that I had my last period and that was back in March! I can honestly say that I don’t really feel pregnant, obviously at work when I’m sitting on the floor picking up toys or bending up and down knackers me out a lot more than it used to but other than that… nothing! I’m not having morning sickness or even feeling sick. I have only gone off a few foods such as noodles… I really can’t stomach noodles at the moment they just make me want to vom! I feel a bit bloated but thats about it really. It will be amazing when I start to feel the baby move. Because sometimes I freak out worrying that maybe I’m not pregnant anymore because I don’t feel it, I can’t feel anything and I’m still hardly bumping! I was so wrong! I thought I’d bump out pretty fast because I’m slim. But I’m going more round.

Here’s some 12 week photos πŸ™‚

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It looks a bit of a weird shape to me haha! But I have always felt that it was beginning to poke out slightly more on the right side rather than the left?

Kirsty x

Choosing a moses basket..?

Yes, I know it’s probably a little bit too early to be looking at moses baskets etc. But who can resist temptation when looking at cute baby things πŸ™‚ I must admit, I have probably been into mothercare one too many times over the past 2 and a half months! (3 very soon!)

Now I’ve finally chosen a colour scheme / wallpaper that I would like I think I can start getting small bits and pieces such as sheets/blankets etc. Which I haven’t just yet πŸ™‚ I was browsing on the mothercare app and saw all of the little moses baskets. Theres too many to choose from!

Some aren’t too expensive and then others can be a tad pricey, but thats probably the same with everything. On mothercare they range from Β£35.00 – Β£130.00! I am pretty in love with this one though…
http://www.mothercare.com/Mothercare-Apples-and-Pears-Moses-Basket/690047,default,pd.html

It’s not the usual shape of a moses basket (not ones you usually see anyway) which is what I think drew me to it in the first place. They also do this one in a ‘baskety’ colour, haha pretty rubbish explanation. I mean the usual brown wicker basket colour πŸ˜‰ I’m not sure how much I’d want to spend on a moses basket though. I do want one that I love and that will be comfortable for my baby, this one will also go with the room scheme! But at the same time I’d also rather spend more on the baby’s clothing, pushchair etc. I can’t wait to get the pushchair! (eek!)

Here’s one that I like that is retailed in mothercare for Β£38.50, this one is currently in clearance too!
http://www.mothercare.com/Mothercare-Bear-and-Friends-Moses-Basket/721652,default,pd.html

Mothercare is the sole place that I have been looking at for baby things as I’m not really a fan of mamas and papas, if anyone knows of any other good baby shops they can recommend me I am open to suggestions πŸ™‚ I mean, when isn’t anyone in the mood to look at baby things πŸ˜€

Kirsty x

Decorating my room!

I need help decorating my room! for a start, I’m rubbish at it.. but I’m out of ideas completely. I think I need something neutral or something that I can add too later on, seeing as obviously I don’t know the baby’s sex yet. As for now the baby and myself will have the same room.

At the moment my room isn’t very well decorated because its been left from when I moved out previously. Its just a horrible blue colour and I’d love to get rid of it πŸ˜‰ I say I want something neutral but I also want a feature wall – maybe? I love certain colours like pinks, greens etc. but I don’t want to go too far one way incase its the opposite sex.

Obviously I’m not turning the whole of my room into a nursery but some little stickers in the corner or something to make it cosy would be cute.. My room isn’t the biggest of rooms but I’m able to fit a double wardrobe a double bed and a tv and still have a bit of space so I suppose its workable πŸ˜‰

 

I went to have a look around B&Q the other week, they have tonnes of colours its so hard to know where to start, but they also have some gorgeous wallpapers. I noticed once which was literally all gold and sparkled. That would probably be too much, but it was amazing! It comes in silver and pink too! Here it is if you want to have a look πŸ™‚ Going by the actual wallpaper I would have thought that it would have looked too much once its on the wall, but looking at the photos someone has posted in the reviews it actually looks quite elegant!
http://www.diy.com/departments/sparkle-gold-texture-metallic-glitter-wallpaper/1275088_BQ.prd

I love yellow and grey for a baby, so if I could have it as a whole room and actually pull it off, I think that would be nice πŸ™‚
http://www.diy.com/departments/flower-sketch-grey-yellow-floral-wallpaper/307402_BQ.prd
This is pretty! If you can’t see it for some reason its a white background wallpaper with yellow and grey sketches of flowers. πŸ™‚

I’d still love to do something like the photo above if I decided to not go with wallpaper, I’ve used wall stickers before and they’ve turned out amazing πŸ™‚

Anyways I’ll keep brainstorming and posting my ideas but if anyone has any ideas please feel free to comment πŸ™‚

Kirsty x

Feeling a bit like an old woman!

( No offence to any older women by the title of my blog post by the way πŸ˜‰ )

I work in a day nursery with children under 5 and even though I’m only 11 weeks pregnant (nearly) I already feel it when I’m doing daily physical things! I didn’t think that it would have any effect on me just yet.

So basic things of my job include lifting children up to change nappies or wave goodbye to their mummy or daddy at the window in the morning when they’re a little bit upset, moving (very light) tables and chairs getting ready for the children’s meal times. Bending down to pick up dropped toys or cups from the floor. I seriously feel like I have been at the gym for about an hour afterwards!

My feet are beginning to ache a little now, I’m not constantly on my feet all day at work but walking around and standing is quite a big part of it. Today (08.06.16) we had to move all of the garden toys off the grass for the gardeners, the girls I work with are lovely. Telling me off if they think I’m moving something that I shouldn’t, if its too heavy or too bulky or whatever. I’m not the type of person that can’t be doing anything at work though! I have to keep busy and me not being able to do things is going to be difficult for me!

I wonder how close to my due date I’m going to carry on working, because if I’m feeling like this now, god help me when I get further along! It may just be something that lasts for a short while and then disappears before coming back. Like the morning sickness! I started getting that around 6-7 weeks, maybe 8. It lasted for about a week and I haven’t had it since, not even the ‘sicky’ feeling. But today its started to come back – I feel pretty sick today. Maybe its moving the garden furniture. I’m not sure. At this moment in time I’m glad I’m based with 2 year olds rather than babies, that would be challenging!

It would be nice to talk to other people who are about the same way through their pregnancy journey as myself. I’d like to know how their emotions are going. I feel pretty down today. I just keep thinking about how ready I was for this, before everything back in April happened. I know not everyones situations are the same, life would be boring if they were and I appreciate the fact that I’ve been given an amazing opportunity such as my own child, as I know there are people out there who are unable to conceive. I think there is something available on the internet where you are able to chat with people who are about the same way through their journey pregnancy as you, but I’m unsure how I’m able to access this?

Kirsty x

10 Weeks and 3 Days pregnant (I believe!)

Obviously I can’t say that I am definitely 10 weeks and 3 days pregnant because I have not yet had my dating scan! I don’t really feel pregnant anymore.. My morning sickness only lasted what? a week! The stomach cramps and constant uncomfortable feeling has disappeared. And its still too early to feel the baby move!

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Today I went to go and put on a crop top for this amazing weather and I noticed that I’m starting to get a small bump. It will seem teeny tiny to everyone else but to me its the biggest I’ve ever been! I can’t even wear my crop tops anymore haha πŸ˜€ It’ll be worth it in the end I’m sure πŸ™‚

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See! Like I say, it will seem teeny to some people, but to me its still something that I’ve not had there before! Seeing my bump start to form has definitely made me feel more excited πŸ™‚ Hopefully within the next few weeks I may start to feel small flutters as my baby begins to move! (Thats if I’m as far as I believe i am πŸ™‚ ) All will be confirmed at the end of the month πŸ™‚

Kirsty x

Got my scan dates through!!

So yesterday in through the post came the letter from the NHS that I’ve been waiting for! I got my first two scan dates πŸ™‚ I knew my first one was going to be somewhat close to my 21st birthday, but its the day before! Reading the letter and its telling me all about what I need to do when I get to the hospital etc etc. But then it comes down to it, apparently unless otherwise stated by the Sonographer I can only take one person into the room with me.

Me and the baby’s father aren’t in a relationship and we aren’t really on amazing terms at the moment either. But I can’t and I won’t prevent him from seeing his child at a scan. But on the other hand, my mum is my best friend and she always has been. It would mean the world for her to come in with me also. We will just have to see how it goes on the day, I mean theres always the scan photographs that she can see πŸ™‚ – Β£5 for two! I never knew you had to pay for them. (haha)

Am I looking forward to it? The most expected answer would be Yes! of course I am. And I am, in my own way. I’m not 100% excited. I don’t feel the way I thought I would feel, being pregnant with my first child. If anyone asked me 5 months ago, “are you ready for a child” I would have jumped to it and I would have shouted yes at them. I felt set, I had my own home, a partner. The ‘proper’ family set up. But here I am now, back at home with my parents, feeling a bit broken and currently trying to juggle the news of being a new parent and trying to move on with my life. I hope that doesn’t make me a bad person? Of course I want my baby. I would never bring a child into this world if I wasn’t prepared to be committed by it. I just wish some things were a little different. πŸ™‚

I wouldn’t be human if I didn’t say that I was scared. Because in all honesty, I am! I know I have my family and my friends who are going to be there to support me and I’m glad of that πŸ™‚ Yesterday, I was sitting in the nail bar. Watching a little girl probably around 2 years old dancing in the middle of the floor with her mum whilst who I presume was her grandma was getting her nails done. She waited so patiently, entertaining herself with the music that was coming from the TV, couldn’t help thinking that I will be doing things like that, a couple of years from now. After her grandma was finished, this little 2 year old sat down in the chair and sat beautifully whilst she had her nails painted a pretty pink! Watching just touched my heart, because thats the type of things I want to do with my baby. ( If its a girl of course! πŸ˜‰ )

Kirsty x

The fears and doubts of pregnancy..

This is something I’ve been struggling to write about because obviously, having a baby is meant to be the best feeling in the world. Once you hold your baby in your arms. But how about the emotional rollercoaster that women/couples go through? I mean, for any standard couple finding out that you’re going to have a baby can be a mixture of feelings; excited, nervous, scared, happy, thrilled, shocked. And all of the rest that come in-between!

I was going through a pretty difficult and dark time when I found out that I was pregnant (I still am in some ways.) but when I took those 2 pregnancy tests on 1st May 2016, I honestly felt numb. I work with children, they’re a passion of mine and always have been. But going through personal issues at the same time it was pretty hard to try and balance the two on my shoulders especially when they were two completely separate issues!

I’m not saying my baby was a mistake because I will never look at my child that way, he or she wasn’t planned but not all pregnancies are. Since finding out I was pregnant just over a month ago I have been on a rollercoaster of emotions. I’ve felt so excited that I’ve just wanted to get up and go out and buy lots of baby things, but then I have also felt the complete opposite. Felt alone and that my whole life was going to end. I felt scared of loosing some close friends who were finding it hard to accept. But thats a part of life and its something I’m probably just going to have to get through.

Reading other peoples pregnancy blogs and watching pregnancy vlogs have helped me to understand that everyones situation is different. Some people are with their partners happily married and having children and others are completely alone. I may not have a partner to back me up and support me anymore, but I do have my family and community midwife who I know I will always be able to count on.

Everyones lives drastically change when a baby becomes involved because its no longer just about you. I intend to take a part time college course when I’m approx. 6-7 months pregnant. therefore I will not have completed it by the time the baby is here, so that is going to be a challenge in itself! But it will be worth it πŸ™‚

I’ve followed the Youtuber ‘Britneyandbaby’ since she was pregnant with her first child who is now a toddler. I must say, she is so inspirational and I thought that from the first video I watched of hers. Its a huge thing to do; just put most of your life out there to share with the world, definitely daunting! If you’ve never watched her videos you definitely should! πŸ™‚

Doubts. now this is probably a topic not may people like to think about when they find out that they are pregnant because its something that is frowned upon by a lot of people. But in reality more people think about abortion than is let on. In 100% honesty I did consider it. I am currently going through a difficult time and didn’t feel that I was emotionally stable enough to look after a child, I also thought was it fair to bring a child into this world? Everyone must have some sort of doubt or questioning during their pregnancy. Not necessarily considering abortion but they may have doubts run through their mind.

The thing that changed my mind or helped me to make a decision was the future. I can’t mope around for the rest of my life. As much as I want to, being in love for 5 years is a long time. Its not something that you can just let go of. Its something that I want to cling on to forevermore. But that isn’t going to help me either, so I’m going to just have to focus on my baby and whats best for us!

Some people aren’t aware of what help is out there, not everyone feels comfortable talking to their GP. I know that I try and avoid it wherever possible! Sometimes I feel so judged by them! But there are plenty of options that women/couples can think about. Such as;

  • Your community midwife
  • Most areas run support groups for younger mums (teenage mums)
  • Pre-natal classes. this can range from anything such as a tour of the labour ward of your hospital to support for parents having multiples or just to get advice on how to handle yourself during labour.
  • Your local children’s centre. there are lots of professionals who can advise and give support here πŸ™‚
  • For the UK there are a range of support helplines that you are able to call:Β http://www.supportline.org.uk/problems/pregnancy.php (there are also a couple of websites here that you can visit too)

Kirsty x